Refreshing my heart, head and emotions!

A high level of self care is required for me to operate at my highest and best during these stressful times. Otherwise, like all of us, I run the risk of being stuck in confusion and frustration by the intensively, changing terrain around me.

I have observed that when I am experiencing an increase in chaos or stress, I may become preoccupied with what is causing that for me. And until I realize I am doing this, my focus on self care may lessen when I actually need it more for regaining clarity in my thinking, feeling and doing.

This article will illustrate some of the ways I continually refresh my heart (emotionally intuitive), head (clear thinking) and emotions (clear emotion). It’s a 24/7 process. It’s a way of life that protects and enhances being my brightest and best.

Part 1 of this article will include: high priority / commitment & discipline / creating space / mindfulness / breathing awareness / decompressing in the heat of the moment-hour-day.

Part 2 of this article, published next week, will include: personal life / work life / physical exercise / diet and nutrition / restful sleep.

Part 3 of this article, published in 2 weeks, will include: nature / purpose / spiritual / trust / celebration.

1) Self care is a high priority for me. So I have an ongoing plan, with structure, strategy and supports - personal and professional.

2) My commitment and discipline for this is genuine and high. What keeps me on track is how I am effected when I slip from consistent self care, along with the clarity and vitalization when I am consistent. This requires I pay ongoing attention to this process

3) Creating the space to get out of the noise is one of my first action steps for creating my self care foundation. By reducing the outer noise and the resulting inner noise that can linger, I’m positioned to become more still and quiet. To enable this I do a number of things, including: schedule clear and firm times for both personal or business / find ways to resolve or manage lingering issues that could otherwise divert my attention at any time / organize my work space as well as personal space for privacy and efficiency.

4) Simple mindfulness practice, I have learned to refresh my awareness and vitality through daily mindfulness practices for decades. There are levels to this practice. For me, this begins by shifting into a slower pace of calm and stillness. Some personal guidelines include: focusing my awareness on now, in present moment / simply being aware of what I am observing and experiencing without thinking or judgment (as best I can) / it can be very helpful to be more aware of, and actually experience, my breathing.

My day begins with a period of mindfulness which helps set the tone for my day. If this is new to you, I recommend starting with 5 minutes and progressing to 20 minutes or more, especially on weekends.

I’ll repeat the mindfulness for a few minutes during my day. I’ve found doing this consistently creates a reliable foundation for being refreshed. So when I suddenly feel more frustrated about something, I usually have the clarity to get up, move around for a moment, while breathing more fully and mindfully. Soon the frustration has eased enough so my mindful-intuition reemerges. I am then positioned to resolve what’s at hand.

This is a simple process yet learning to get through the distractions becomes an ongoing commitment and discipline. As with all self care practices, I find it useful to schedule daily times to check in with myself about my current level of mindfulness & awareness. I’ll also note my level of stress, along with anything I can do right now to mindfully refresh.

Becoming consistently mindful, regardless of circumstances, involves a process that is developed and matured over time, step by step.

5) My awareness and experience of breathing is another fundamental that enables every area of my life. Yet when I am deeply stressed, I probably don’t notice I am not breathing below the upper level of my lungs. I’m probably breathing at about 10 to 20% of my capacity. So when I need to operate at maximum capacity, I only have about 10 to 20% of the fuel to perform at my brightest and best.

When feeling stressed, I may resist looking at what is causing it, along with any feelings I have in response. In effect, I’ve discovered that when I am resisting something, I am also restricting my breathing.

So to resolve or manage the stressful situation, it becomes necessary to face it directly for understanding and the best strategy. This requires I have the maximum flow of the fuel and refreshment provided by breathing.

I schedule times daily when I focus on breathing for a few minutes. I will stop any other activity and give it my full attention. I find it helpful to relax and simply notice the experience of the breath flowing through my nose, chest / belly and body. Sometimes I experience its flow and vitality. Other times I’ll feel tension in my belly or upper shoulders and back. I’ll then gently breath into the tense area(s) for a moment and find it helps me relax and breathe more fully, especially when I do this with consistency.

When feeling tense, I may count 1-2-3-4 during the inhale and the exhale. This offers the guidance and structure for my breathing through the tension.

I also find it useful to get away from the seeming demands of my work by going for 2 or 3 short walks daily. I focus on experiencing my breathing while noticing the environment of my walk. Again, learning to do this consistently has become a routine which makes a difference during the hours of my day.

6) Decompressing in the heat of the moment-hour-day is a vital cornerstone in the foundation of my self care. I’m human and can get stressed. So having a series of strategies for responding to any type of situation is essential.

Something may happen that soars my tension quickly. My body becomes tense and my breathing restricted. During these times when I could benefit from seeing myself and the playing field clearly, I may slip into tunnel vision. Things can become a blur and overwhelm may command my attention.

So the first step for me is to get out of the environment where I got overwhelmed, even if for a few minutes. Because continuing to focus on the frustrating situation would keep me locked in the tunnel vision and restricted reaction.

There are several strategies I’ve found useful. My first action of choice is going for a walk. This can be surprisingly effective. It feels freeing to move my body which releases some of the tension. Mindfully breathing can also help release the tightness in my mood and feeling.

When I am especially struck in frustration, I will schedule daily walks wherein I simply look at the objects around me. The process of just looking at the things around me, without thinking about them, can help to release the inner preoccupation with thinking about what is causing me stress.

Occasionally I may feel an intensity of frustration that I can’t release through my usual practices. An intense physical workout, per the ability of my conditioning, will usually release it for me. I then find it necessary to apply other strategies of self care to ensure I’m resolving what had caused the stress.

At any point I may reach out to someone I trust for support.

I usually need to continue functioning with some effectiveness during these times. So I do what I can, when I can. Even a few minutes of something useful is better than doing nothing.

As I’m regaining clarity and vitality, I’ll continue to access the situation and what can be done to create solutions.

Questions for reigniting your self care foundation.

1) During the intensity and pace of your day-week-year, which of these 6 fundamentals have not even been on your radar?

2) Be encouraged to muse on them over the next few days.

3) Choose 1 or 2 that, when improved, can generate a difference in your personal and work life.

4) What is your action plan and supports for taking the first, and next steps?

If these fundamentals of self care speak with you, then be encouraged to reach out for an innovative and complimentary Talk Time with Otan.